20 September 2009

My Car Elazar

Friday I got in my car Elazar and started warming him up. He needed his tires rotated and oil changed. Seeing as how I had no school I figured that Friday was a good day to take care of him. After letting him warm up a bit I slipped him into reverse and started backing him out. In the process of backing up Elazar honked his horn. I was a little startled but he had done this a few weeks back so I wasn't too shocked. I was embarrassed though. There was a girl walking to her apartment and she looked my way but kept walking. Then he honked again causing the girl to whip her head around and glare at me. I decided that Elazar and I were going to have a talk. So we drove out into the country, turning as little as possible so reduce the amount of random honking, and we talked.

We talked about how he, Elazar, should not be sharing his views and opinions with the world. Not only is he not very well informed about world events (occasionally listening to talk radio doesn't count as being 'well informed'). More importantly, people understand car honks only slightly better than they understand why birds poop on bald people's heads.

I think the lubricant was causing something in the steering wheel assembly to stick when it was cold. Not being one to volunteer for unexpected embarrassments I pulled over to the side of the road near some fields, pulled out my tools and performed surgery again. This time I crimped a small plate into place. I hadn't crimped it back from the last time I did surgery.

I checked on him today and he seems to be behaving much better and no longer shares his opinions with the world. A well behaving car is a wonderful car.

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